Wednesday, August 25, 2010

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEAN CONNERY!!

Yep, everyone's favorite Scottish bad-ass turned the big 8-0 today! And of course here at Sugary Cynicism, where Sean Connery is God, Zeus, Jehovah, Ganesh and whatever religions I can't be bothered to remember but also wish to offend, all rolled up into one cranky old kilt-wearin' mofo, this is important. Over the 8 or so months this blog has been alive, I've reviewed literally dozens of his movies (working on all of them), brought you random-ass fan videos, proof that he talk-sings like William Shatner, and various examples of why he is a PNTFW (Person Not To be Fucked With). And now it's his birfday!

He doesn't need a birthday wish, but just for good measure, he stole one of yours, and yes, it was the wish you made for a pony

Ya know, I get that idolizing Sean Connery is a bit weird. And it doesn't mean I'm blind to his flaws, such as certain misogynistic prick tendencies, or the insanity of turning down the role of Gandalf in favor Allan Quartermain. But in the end, he's just a dude, and dude's are flawed and fucked up just like the rest of us. Does that make it ok? Eh, the jury's out, but in lieu of Megan Fox, Ashton Kutcher or even Sylvester Stallone, I'll take Sean Connery, ancient but still a raging bad-ass who could give a shit what anyone thinks and can turn any terrible, ridiculous role into something entertaining, who can manage to look scary even in a bear suit, and who when he makes a bad movie, makes the BEST bad movie. And he'll always be 007 and Daddy Jones to me.












Happy B-day, Mr. Bond.

"Love may not make the world go round, but I must admit that it makes the ride worthwhile" -Sean Connery

4 comments:

  1. Sean Connery will always be Juan Sánchez Villa-Lobos Ramírez ("Spanish peacock") to me.

    "I’m not Spanish, I’m Egyptian."

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sean Connery should be in every movie. Just because. When he passes, along with Clint Eastwood, and Morgan Freeman, Hollywood will forever be damaged. There isn't one single person out there that can even attempt to fill those shoes. What would be awesome, is if all three of them did a movie together! Now THAT would be a joygasm. ;D

    ReplyDelete
  3. I thought you were replacing him with Helen Mirren? You're so inconsistent.

    When he dies, surely the earth will weep, the barren deserts will flood, and that pesky global warming problem will be solved. Imagine what Morgan Freeman's death will bring.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Jacob: I forgot to put up a highlander video. But I am also too lazy to rectify the situation.

    Rich: Broken hips all around!

    Simon: When Morgan Freeman dies, all narration as we know it will cease to be

    ReplyDelete

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