Thursday, July 15, 2010

Sugary Cynic's (Wholly Uninteresting) Day Off

Yeah so I didn't have work today, which when I was like fifteen/sixteen was all like "whoo! Day off!" but now that I am a "Responsible Adult" it's all like "marrr, no money made today". Getting old is stupid. Of course it doesn't help that I didn't do anything fun, mostly just layed around on my ass, going out once to get my new glasses:

I have instantly become tenfold more intelligent!

And then I saw all the neat crap I can do on with my mom's computer's webcam: I in Narnia?



This is what I look like all the time when viewed in Hi-Def

Er...ok, webcam. I'm done. You can put that away

I might have had a little too much fun...

I spent the rest of the day keeping the cats from killing each other and skimming about on Netflix, where I found this movie from 2001 called The Musketeer whose only real claim to fame is Tim Roth is in it and it's choreography was done by the guy who did Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. This leads to a bland, run-of-the-mill movie where the muskteers's story is told for the umpteenth time with ABSOLUTELY AWESOME FIGHT SCENES. It's like "blablabla D'Artagnon wants to be a musketeer but they're disbanded and that is boring bablablabla Tim Roth is a crazy bastard and that is less boring blablabla OH WAIT LET'S SWORDFIGHT ON THIS MOVING CARRIAGE WHILE DOING BACK FLIPS"

It's a cheesy movie, but it's not all bad. I actually like this D'Artagnan more than any other one I've seen in a musketeer movie, and sadly I've seen a lot of musketeer movies. Most D'Artagnan's are spunky, naive little pansies. This D'Artagnan is hardened, bad-ass and proactively saving the kingdom while being a cool dude. Athos, Porthos and Aramis have much smaller roles than typically, but are fairly entertaining as drunk ass-butts who give D'Artagnan a hard time but back him up in the ass-kicking. It's an ok swashbuckler that would be entirely forgettable if not cool stuff like the final fight against Tim Roth's character, which can only be described as a ladderstravaganza.

Unfortunately, there isn't a video of it, but I was reading that it apparently was based on a similar fight scene from One Upon A Time In China, and watching it, yeah they're basically the same thing. So here's that:

Two and a half ladders out five. Also, it's neither here nor there, but at the end of the movie, D'Artagnan is wearing the hat that Orlando Bloom wears at the end of the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie. I gues it was just laying around after The Musketeer

I can't find a picture of D'Artagnan wearing it but it was totally the exact same hat with the weird ruffly buckle

In other news, Due Date finally has a trailer:

Honestly, doesn't look as funny as I thought it would be. Gali-whatever just seems to be playing the same guy he did in The Hangover. Looks iffy but this is just the teaser.

Galifa-igiveup looks much more interesting in It's Kind Of A Funny Story, which caught my interest today:

This actually looks kinda promising, at the very at least it makes me want to read the book it was based on

Finally, tomorrow's post should come from my computer as my charger should be arriving in the mail tomorrow. Hopefully. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be taking my foam swords and looking for some ladders.

(After Tim Roth's character, Febre, steals away the love interest)

D'Artagnon: "Do not harm her!"

Febre: "But I feel the need to harm someone"


  1. You want awesome swordfights involving Rob Roy? Watch Rob Roy, where he's a crazy bastard, but with a wig.

    It's Kind of a Funny Story sparked a whole war between my sister and me. We both read it, and we both were trying to get custody of the thing (we're really possessive of books, see), and it was kind of epic.

    Snsppy glasses.

    Due Date looks kind of boring.

    I only do volunteer stuff at the library, and I took off today to see Inception (gah), so I don't gotta worry about making no money. The only thing I get outta that shit is something to do and credible references for the college resume I'll never write.

  2. I like Zach Galifianakis. I can relate to him.

  3. Simon: Rob Roy is currently sitting in my netflix instant queue, waiting for me to stop forgetting it's there. Also I guess I shouldn't ask to borrow the book from you lol

    Unwashed: You must like him to put in the time and effort it takes to properly spell his name


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