Friday, June 25, 2010

Things I Did This Evening...

Spoke French

Made literary jokes

Poked a gay man in the stomach

Wore a sock monkey as a hat

Got Starbucks food by making sad puppy eyes

Made a haiku about cheese that I can no longer remember

Tried on Iron Man galoshes (galoshes is a funny word. Is it always two galoshes or can there be a single galosh?)

Listened to songs from Evil Dead: The Musical



Won a duel

Lost a duel

Enacted violence on a minority (he started it)

Threw a ball at someone (he asked for it)

Got a ball thrown at me (I asked for it)

Took a plastic sword to the boob

Spoke Swahili

Possibly permanently damaged a tricycle

Definitely permanently damaged a red wagon

Enacted the dreams of disturbed Twilight fans everywhere using Edward and Jacob barbie dolls

Interrupted a tender moment via vuvuzela impersonation (for those scratching their heads and saying "vuvu-wha?", you live under a rock, now watch this video)



Spoke Latin

Imitated Elmo

And also Mickey Mouse

Became trapped in a parking lot

Escaped the parking lot

Was denied a bouncy ball

Learned more about the complicated relationship between Wolverine and Deadpool

Spoke Spanish (badly)

Violated a man on his birthday (Happy birthday, Izzy! ...sorry)

Tested the Vulcan neck pinch with varying levels of success

Sat in the shadow of Bhuddha on a very comfy sofa


And that is why there is no post tonight (and also no paint drawings, sorry Jacob) but it was definitely time well spent :D

12 comments:

  1. But you know what you didn't do? You didn't have a conversation with the (wo)man in the mirror. I like that person, they are so much like me, which probably means you'd like them too, most likely.

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  2. What is a riddle but words? What are words but riddles? Riddle me this, is it all but one big riddle? Perhaps you are the biggest riddler of all.

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  3. Memories of my first ever Disney trip (my first!!) will be forever haunted by your Mickey Mouse impersonations of "Hi kids! I'm legally required to inform you that I'm a registered sex offender WOO HOO!"...thanx for that.

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  4. A very busy day indeed...and multilingual as well! I am impressed...worth waiting for the cartoons :)

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  5. hehe....i was a part of the night of silly epicness...you also forgot to mention witnessing your best friend being attacked in the front seat of your car by his boyfriend.

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  6. Aw thanks for violating me :)

    NOW WHERE ARE MY COOKIES!!!!!

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  7. Can you go to the mall with me? I imagine it would be awesome.

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  8. Anon: ...I give up

    Ashley: always happy to ruin the purer parts of your childhood hopes and dreams

    Ron: I lead an exciting and multilinguisitical life

    Anon-Jon: I wanted to spare my gentle readers the mental scarring...

    Anon-Izzy: my pleasure :p, the cookies are in the mail, obviously

    Simon: just know that I have a rather astonishing record of getting thrown out of various stores and malls

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  9. I AM IN LOVE WITH THAT VIDEO.

    That is all.

    Just wanting to let you know I live. My apologies for not being online lately. I have been sickly since Thursday night.

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  10. Since I live, may I claim my prize?

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