Saturday, March 20, 2010

'Cause It's The Best Day Eveeeerrrr!

And I hate Spongebob with a violent passion, so that should give you an idea of my mood right now.

Ok so, sorry about yesterday, it was spent discovering terrible parks (it's in the middle of the forest! And three feet to the left from US1), procrastinating on papers and eventually playing Mario Kart. I utilized many fantastic swears that I've picked up from Roomie Laura and kicked a sufficient amount of ass, though I felt bad for Akiva because that boy cannot videogame his way out of a paper bag. (Actually, I'm not sure how that would work, exactly)

Something like this, I suppose...

Also we went to McDonalds, which is open at 3am, and the employees are very upset about this, that's the best explanation I have for the terrifying amount of bitchery we faced at the drive-thru:

drive-thru lady: Whatchu want?

Me to Akiva: Snack wrap!

Akiva: One snack wrap?

drive-thru lady: We got the numbah two, the numbah three and numbah four!

(The number two was a quarter-pounder so I asked Akiva to ask for a cheeseburger because I didn't want a whole quarter-pounder and how hard is it for them to just put one patty on the bun instead of two?)

Apparently harder than I thought because...


So we got a number 2.

Then we pulled up to the pay window and as we payed we heard her doing it to the people in the car behind us...

drive-thru lady: What's yo drink? (10 second pause) WHAT'S YO DRANK? (not a spelling mistake, also another ten second pause) WHAT IS YO DRAAANK?!

(TERROR) Can we please go to Taco Bell next time? They're much more apathetic after midnight

Yeah. (Epilogue: There was only one patty on my quarter-pounder anyway)

So then after we had gotten back and I was about to collapse in bed I realized that I had not posted for friday and made the horrific and painful post you see below this one. Because I am just THAT dedicated. Also, that picture of Hilary Clinton will haunt me until the day I die....Her eyes...the staring...O.o So yeah, extra-long post today to make up for last night's ridiculosity. Continuing! I woke up today with that darn raccoon in my skull (read thursday's post for clarification) but perked up quick to take part in what is fast becoming school tradition: Open House Pillow Fight. Open House is when all the prospective student mucnhkins come by and get shepherded around the prettiest parts of campus. In the Open House in November, as a gag, a bunch of guys had a pillow fight on the rec field and it actually ended up on MyLifeIsAverage which, because we are such a nerdy-ass school, was the coolest thing ever.

"Today, I was on a campus tour on Open House Day. I walked out of a building to witness a very intense 30 person pillow fight on a large recreation field. The tour guide was speechless. I know where I'm going to college. MLIA"

This was us. Fo' serious, it was on the exact day and we did all the back-checking and yeah, basically we rule.

So it was done again, this time organized on Facebook, and I brought a foam sword along with my did at least three other guys (I kind of heart my college). We screamed such inspiring things as "FREEDOM!" "FOR NARNIA!" and "AIM FOR THE TITS!" and brought pillow-related awe unto the lives of countless visiting high schoolers. One can only hope we make it on MLIA again :D

Ah, but the awesome does not end there! Today was my laundry day and I kind of had a crap-ton of laundry as well as spindly, useless T-rex arms

Me, 65 Million years ago, desperately attempting to carry my (invisible) laundry basket

So instead I put it on my skateboard and pushed it along, clever girl that I am. I kicked it along, kicked it too hard and the front shot up and my laundry basket was frozen in the wheelie-popped position! Of course I took a picture on my phone, but can't figure out how to get it on my computer, so for now you must imagine the awesomeness of my skateboarding laundry. Imagine harder! HARDER! WHAT'S YO DRAAANK?!

...Ok, time for me to put said laundry in the dryer and actually get some work done. Or fall asleep listening to The Police, either way. But first, I found this and believe I have stumbled onto some kind of conspiracy:

THE CONNERY IS A ROBOT! (Or that water from the Holy Grail in Last Crusade wasn't a prop)

All righty, see you tomorrow for the continuing adventures of SugaryCynic! (theme music plays)

"How come the dove gets to be the peace symbol? How about the pillow? It has more feathers than the dove, and it doesn't have that dangerous beak" -From the SNL sketch, "Deep Thoughts from Jack Handy"

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